


Catapulting

by petitecanard



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/F, Romance, Time Travel, baby gays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:21:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28917522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/petitecanard/pseuds/petitecanard
Summary: When Hermione was fifteen she noticed Marlene McKinnon wearing cute glasses that perched on her freckled, button nose. Hermione had two goals in her Fifth Year: defeat Voldemort and date Marlene. Hermione already knew how to kill Voldemort. Seducing Marlene seemed infinitely more difficult than burning a few Horcruxes created by a wizard terrorist. Teenage hormones really skewed her perspective.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Marlene McKinnon
Kudos: 13





	Catapulting

The Catapulting, as Hermione called it, occurred a few days after Hermione’s 21st birthday. She had recently entered the Auror Department. Her plan was to rise in ranks until she reached a position with real power. Becoming Minister for Magic had crossed her mind, largely because everyone else in the magical world suffered from major incompetency.

Hermione’s plans hit major road blocks when Hermione stumbled upon a smuggling and illegal potion-making business during a patrol. A fight ensued. Hermione was caught in a bevy of clashing spells. She may have died, passed out, fainted, etc. The details were hazy.

In 1962 the DMLE found a crying baby in a field. The baby, Hermione, spent the night in the Auror Offices. After Moody adopted her, Hermione would spend many more days and nights playing by her father’s desk.

Moody was an odd character for a father, but he and Hermione got along well and loved each other deeply. Moody’s tendency to be more Auror than father was made up by his dear friends, the Potters, who were Hermione’s godparents.

Hermione could luckily play off the eccentricities that came with being reborn as the oddities of being raised by Alastor “Mad-Eye” Moody. Which was good, because Hermione had not been considered normal even before she had been catapulted backwards through time.

By the time she entered Hogwarts in 1971, Hermione was devoted to Moody, the Potters, and defeating Voldemort. Within hours of entering Hogwarts and being Sorted back into Gryffindor  Hermione destroyed Ravenclaw’s Diadem with Fiendfyre, which she had been secretly practicing for years. 

When Hermione was fifteen she noticed Marlene McKinnon wearing cute glasses that perched on her freckled, button nose. Hermione had two goals in her Fifth Year: defeat Voldemort and date Marlene. Hermione already knew how to kill Voldemort. Seducing Marlene seemed infinitely more difficult than burning a few Horcruxes created by a wizard terrorist. Teenage hormones really skewed her perspective. 

Hermione, the Brightest Witch of Her Age, knew many things. She did not, however, know how to express her perfectly normal teenage emotions, so she contented herself with staring at the Marlene while she played Quidditch and analyzing the way her blonde hair framed her heart-shaped face. 

Hermione and Marlene had friends in common, so Hermione enjoyed the distinct torture of spending time with Marlene and thus falling deeper into her obsession. It was debilitating to spend so much time thinking about Marlene’s lips when Hermione had an evil wizard to defeat. 

The summer between 5th and 6th year Hermione practically lived at the Potters. Marlene also spent time there, being James’s only cousin his age who wasn’t a blood supremacist. James had his little Marauder group to maraud with, so Hermione and Marlene spent time together. Hermione entered 6th Year with an even stronger desire to wrap herself up in Marlene’s lithe body and sunshine laughter. 

Weak from her helpless thoughts, Hermione confided in James. He laughed uproariously at her hopeless crush, which was unfair because he was enjoying an even more unrequited love affair with Lily EvansJames also solemnly swore to help. Having seen how he acted around Lily, Hermione didn’t think he would be particularly useful.

James became too enthusiastic of an ally for Hermione’s taste. He would wink or nudge or grin obnoxiously when Marlene was near Hermione. She rolled her eyes so often at James’s antics that Hermione was worried her eyes would get stuck and she would no longer be able to look at Marlene’s legs in the Hogwarts skirt. With James’s encouragement, Hermione tried to kind of maybe somewhat flirt with Marlene. They became friends who liked to play with each others hands.

James insisted Marlene liked her. Hermione thought he was ridiculous and decided to ignore her feelings by finding and destroying more of Voldemort’s horcruxes.

Over winter break of 6th Year, Hermione destroyed the ring. When she returned to Hogwarts, she started uselessly following Regulus in the hope that she would know when he got the locket. 

Marlene asked Hermione if she liked Regulus.

“What?” Hermione said, so shocked by the interrogation that her next words were, “no, of course not. I like _you._ ”

Marlene said, “oh.” 

She walked away. 

Hermione had failed at both collecting Voldemort’s horcruxes and not mucking up her relationship with Marlene. 

James tried to sympathize by detailing the infinite times he had been rejected by Lily and still retained hope. This didn’t make Hermione feel better. Hermione couldn’t unsee Marlene’s stiff shoulders or how Marlene’s eyes skirted off Hermione’s when they were in the same room. She missed the times they studied in the library and their walks around the Black Lake.

In the midst of this emotional turmoil, Hermione schemed about how to steal the Diary and the Cup. There weren’t good Horcrux-finding options available to Sixth Years, even brilliant ones like Hermione Moody. When school let out for the summer she finally confided everything to Moody. 

He warded her inside the house and screamed for six hours about how reckless Hermione had been before slamming the door on the way out of the house. Moody returned late that night with the Diary and the Cup. 

“You’re kidding,” Hermione said, eyes wide. 

“You’re grounded,” Moody grunted.

Once Moody set Aurors to watch Regulus, Hermione returned to the normal teenage angst of hopeless love.

On September 1st Hermione stood on the train platform and viewed James and Lily’s flirting with narrowed eyes.

“I never thought it would actually happen,” Marlene said, nodding at the pair. Hermione was shocked. Marlene hadn’t spoken to her in months.

“I knew they liked each other,” Hermione said. “But I still don’t understand it. How does that happen?” 

Marlene tucked her blonde hair behind her ear. “I don’t know either, but do you want to give it a try?” 

Hermione stared at her.

Marlene twisted her hands, suave confidence wavering in the face of Hermione’s silence. “If you want to try, that is.” She bit her lip. “I like you, and I’m sorry I ignored you last term. I was scared, because I’m a shit Gryffindor.”

“You’re not a shit Gryffindor,” Hermione said automatically. “And I don’t think you’ll be a shit girlfriend.”

Marlene’s answering smile was breathtaking. 

Hermione knew defeating Voldemort couldn’t compare to the bliss of holding hands with Marlene as they searched for a private train compartment. 

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this bc girls are too pretty.


End file.
